Things I’m Never Trying: Bo’s Original Slice of Sauce
Anyone who knows me understands my fascination with weird food combinations. I’ve made a partial living out of it. But apparently, ladies and gentlemen, I have standards. And the line is drawn at Slice of Sauce.
There wasn’t a single person in the world with anything against liquid ketchup. I, for one, didn’t get an invite to the protest. Sure, people disliked sauce or preferred mustard and relish to it. But no one went “if only ketchup could be solidified”. No one. Not even her.
That’s Emily Williams, the founder of Bo’s Original Slice of Sauce. Her family ended up with sliced sauce after getting creative while preparing for a barbecue. Yep, this ‘ingenious’ product came about by accident. Sounds about right.
Here’s the 411 on Slice of Sauce: It’s focused on healthy eating. This means there are zero preservatives, it’s rid of GMO and gluten, and made out of completely natural ingredients. But then the branding kills this by pairing it with burgers, sandwiches and slices of cheese. I mean, how many of us put sauce in our daily calorie count?
The next thing Slice of Sauce boasts is its mobility. You don’t need to freeze or wrap it up. “It’s great for lunch boxes, picnics, barbecues, hiking and camping, lunches at your desk or eating on the go.” Allow me to introduce anyone who didn’t grow up in this century to Sachets of Sauce. They’ve been around since, well, forever and serve that very purpose. Flawlessly, might I add (they don’t get enough credit for that).
“It provides you with an even spread of sauce on a burger.” Well, I don’t want it, thank you very much. We’ve come a long way into adapting food packaging to drippy burgers. And anyway, I love the drippiness of burgers. No one can take that away from me. No one had better.
The bottom line is, Slice of Sauce can’t replace ketchup much like curly fries can’t replace french fries. It won’t work, and it won’t appeal to anyone. Except perhaps hipsters. Congratulations Bo, you’ve come up with a fad at best.